Just Be Happy

Friday, February 13, 2009

I am a complete mess... I thought I would be able to handle the first anniversary of my baby's loss (February 14) better, but I guess I was wrong. It's still the 13th and I am already crying my heart out.

My mother-in-law had bought us tickets for tonight to watch "Lion King - the musical" in Seattle, and I really tried to motivate myself into going - I bought a dress, got my hair cut, colored and styled this morning... but just couldn't do it. Once I got home, I was just crying and decided that all I wanted to do is stay at home, quiet with my husband. I'm glad that everyone understood my side.

Anyways, I got a card from my husband's cousin with a beautiful message and thought I should share it with you:

"Nature goes on, continuing its cycle, even while grieving hearts sometimes feel that time is standing still.
It's been a year since your loss, and you will always miss your loved one.
Yet maybe your memories are holding more comfort, your heart is holding more hope and certainly friends are holding you close in thought at this time of remembering"

* Yes, these were my cutie pie's little feet *

It warms my heart to know that I have people praying and sending positive thoughts, helping us get through the rough moments of life.

12 comments:

  1. Alessandra~
    As I told you before, I am saying lots of prayers.
    I feel so blessed that you are sharing this with all of us.
    I know that we are new friends but please know I love you, your hubby, the baby in your tummy and the one you lost.
    As I told you before....your little man is up in heaven to watch over the baby.
    You are such a special woman and you are going to make a wonderful mommy. I wish I could be there to share it with you. Unfortunately, Chicago is really far from you!!!
    XO
    ps I love the pics of the babies feet.....precious!!!!!!!!!!!

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  2. i'm so glad you are able to share with us what you are going through. i have been thinking about you a lot with knowing what you've gone through and now getting ready to have this sweet baby.

    i feel so lucky to have met you through blogging and we live pretty close by. please, if you ever need anything, i will be there. i will keep you in my thoughts and prayers too.

    if you need some time with doing the hats, please don't worry. i'm in no rush. i'm grateful you are willing to use your talents for my little ones.

    i also agree, those are the sweetest little feet.

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  3. Alessandra,

    Those little feet are so precious. I am so glad you have pictures of your precious baby boy. Loads of HUGS to you on this very sad day. It will forever be a sad day, but always remember that short time you did have with him. My good friend lost her first at 21 weeks, and her loss forever changed me for the better. Even though Keelie was only with her and us for such a brief time, she made a tremendous impact on so many lives. Just as your boy I am sure has. Honor that impact, talk with others on how he changed them. It will warm your heart. And give extra love to the one growing in you today.

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  4. I feel your pain. I lost a baby through miscarriage and sometimes it seems like I'm the only one who remembers.

    Be good to yourself and take the time you need. You are all in my thoughts!

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  5. Im glad you were able to blog about this. It must have been so hard. Hang in there and dont forget to smile!

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  6. I Corinthians 10:13

    "There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it."

    So know that God knows everything that you are going through and even though you are in pain, He will continue to give you the strength needed to go through this situation.

    Much Love,
    Libby

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  7. Hi Alessandra, I recently found your blog through Fiddlesticks because I love to crochet. But as I've been reading through your older posts, I realize we have so much more in common! From walks with your dog, to making long lists of things to do, always having more you want to do than the time to do it (that is me all the way), leaving your job to be a stay at home mom at 25 weeks pregnant (I did too!), cooking and baking... And then I read your post this morning as I wait for my 7 week old baby and husband to wake up so we can get ready for church. I wanted to share with you that my brother and his wife lost their newborn son at the end of November 2008 and my daughter (my first) was born December 26, 2008. I have a deep understanding for what you have been through and are going through as you expect your new baby in the midst of both grief and joy. My sister in law and I were so excited about being pregnant together and our pregnancies were very intertwined. I had a very emotional and physical connection to her loss. So, although I don't know you, my heart and my love go out to you and I will pray for you as you cope with your sadness and anticipate your joy. I wish I could have emailed you instead of this long post! God bless.
    R. Morales

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  8. Oh Alessandra...I's so sorry you're blue! My sister lost her first baby and I witnessed first hand her grief. And as time passed, she had two more children. And the tears seemed to come less and less, and her memories sweeter and more comforting. He would be 27 today, and she still wishes she could talk to her son. I'm sending you a big hug!

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  9. I am glad that you were able to stay at home with your husband. Sometimes that is the best way to heal.

    I hope that each day brings you a little more peace.

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  10. Minha amiga
    Também perdi um bébé já há muitos anos. Seria o irmão mais novo do nosso Francisco, que acabou por ser o nosso único filho. Realmente nunca nos esquecemos de como seria ter conosco esse bébé mas acho qus se Deus quis assim, nada havia a fazer. Agora há que ter muita coragem e esperar que o futuro nos traga muitas coisas boas e o menino que perdemos está concerteza a velar por nós.
    Um beijo muito grande
    Ana Paula

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  11. Oh sorry hun I did not read down below. I will keep you in my prayers. So when are you due?

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